Week 2: Make that .2

June 29, 2010

It’s Week 2 weigh-in day for our Project Sailaway contestants.

Well, the good news is, Bunny’s clothes are becoming visibly looser, at least in the nether regions.

The bad news is, she gained 4/10 of a pound.I GAINED???

She’s so pleased.

Not!

Why isn’t she losing? She wasn’t bad. She stayed focus and within her Weight Watchers points all week.

Well, except for a lunch meeting at a lovely restaurant with some harmless roasted chicken and just a smidge of perfectly lovely mushroom risotto…

and then dinner at an Italian restaurant the next night, and well yes, she did have a piece or two of garlic bread and a glass of wine just to be social…

and then the next night they went to the theater and she had a friendly and perfectly harmless turkey sandwich, but it was midnight and she was in bed 45 minutes after she at it…

But that shouldn’t do it. Should it?

Could be.

Or is it the Herbalife shakes for lunch at work? Or the protein bar snacks? Is she consuming too much protein? It’s very clear that things are shrinking, so good things are definitely happening, but we’d like to see some evidence on the scale.

Especially since Trudy jumped out to such a fast lead.

This week, Trudy lost another half pound, for a total of 5 pounds lost.

Congrats again, Trudy!

Alrighty, well, Bunny’s total loss is 2/10 of a pound.

Underwhelming.

But she’ll keep at it!

And she will catch Trudy!

And she will Win! Win! Win!

(um, Mollie? Get our girl back to the gym, ok? Fast.)

Oh, by the way, Trudy asked that we go back to counting tenths, as opposed to our unilateral decision last week to round off to the nearest half-pound. Sure, Trudy, no problem. (Especially since our plan would leave Bunny with zero weight loss. Let’s not kill our girl’s spirit.)

Project Sailaway Scorecard:

Bunny : -0.2

Trudy :  -5.0

Trudy leads the competition by 4.8 lbs.

Gosh, this is kind of depressing.

Inside Bunny’s Head

June 26, 2010

Bunny Thinking HardWe eavesdropped a bit on what’s going on inside Bunny’s head.

Bunny’s excited because she can button the button on the black pants now without digging a deep channel into her skin. This is a change since last week. The pants are still a little snug in the buns, so she still has to wear The Sweater at work.

You know about The Sweater? The all-purpose sweater worn at work over any and all outfits. To go with anything, it must be black (Bunny’s too big for white). She wears The Sweater not because she’s cold (in fact, since she’s BunnyPausal, sometimes she’s sweating like a pig in The Sweater), but it’s long enough to cover her behind and shield the world from the sight of her bumpy hips and tummy, and consequently it makes her feel less self-conscious. So, many days it stays on unless she’s locked inside her office. It’s a security blanket in cardigan form.

Bunny would like to feel good enough about herself to get rid of The Sweater.

Bunny’s annoyed that she has several events this week that will require her to eat out. This takes her off her routine, and makes her guess at what’s the best food choice. Right now, she’d like to stick to her shakes and carrots and tomatoes and protein bars, not have to think about whether to eat this or that, and GET THE TRAIN ROLLING!!! She does NOT want to lose to Trudy again this week. (That girl sure can gloat.)

Bunny’s anxious to get two her next two goals, both of which are within 5 lbs. One is the Weight Watchers Yellow Star, which signifies a loss of 5% of her total body weight. She actually hit that one a few months ago, but drifted up a tad. She wants that back. Now. (Will they give her another Yellow Star, even though she already earned it? We’re thinking yes. They’re very nice and supportive at Weight Watchers.)

The other thing she has her eye on is a great big number. Of course we’re not allowed to disclose her actual weight, but she’s very close to reaching and dipping below a nice round number. She’s very excited about that, and is quite impatient about achieving that goal.

Finally, Bunny’s excited because her jeans are getting a little baggy.

Bunny’s buns are shrinking!!!


Week One Results

June 21, 2010

The Week One results are in!

Before we reveal the total number of pounds lost by our Project Sailaway competitors this week, we’d like to share highlights of our post-weigh-in interview with Bunny.

InterviewWell, Bunny, how do you think you did this week?

Oh, I definitely think I lost weight. I can feel that my pants are a teensy bit looser, so I think I lost some inches in my waist. Well, maybe not inches. An inch in a week seems like a lot. Half inches? Maybe a quarter? What’s smaller than that, milligrams? Whatever, my pants feel looser and yes, I think I lost some weight. I don’t know how much, I can never tell. Any time I think I lost a lot, I lost a little, and if I think I gained, I’ve lost 5 lbs. I have no idea. I’d better have lost something!

Off to Weight Watchers she went. When she returned, we chatted again:

I only lost 6/10 of a pound. I thought it was more.

Well, at least you lost.

Yeah, well… I did have a big lunch and a protein bar snack and 2 big bottles of water not long before the weigh-in. I thought I’d get more week-one water-loss than that. Oh well.

We have Trudy’s results. Would you like to hear them?

She beat me, didn’t she?

Trudy lost 4.5 lbs.

Four and a half pounds!? In a week? Oh my gosh! I bet she ate 3 hot fudge sundaes before she weighed in the first time, then starved herself silly before she weighed in today, just so she’d lose a lot of weight. Four and a half pounds. I’ll never hear the end of it.

Are you suggesting that Trudy cheated?

No, she’s not a cheater. She’s not above being sneaky, though.

Well, keep doing what you’re doing, get back into the gym, and we’ll see how it goes next week. It’s not a sprint, it’s a marathon.

Oh, gosh, that’s a nice platitude. Thanks. Four and a half pounds. Sheesh.

The good news is, you did lose a little in your hips!

I did? an inch?

No, a milligram.

Actually about half an inch.

Project Sailaway Scorecard:

Bunny : -0.6

Trudy :  -4.5

Trudy leads the competition by 3.9 lbs.

Wait a second. Those tenths are just ridiculous. Let’s deal with half-pound increments, and save the tenths for tiebreakers. We’ll round off to the closest half-pound.

You’re taking away another tenth of a pound?

Sorry, Bunny.

Amended Scorecard:

Bunny : -0.5

Trudy : -4.5

Trudy leads the competition by 4 lbs.

Stop gloating, Trudy.

Week One of Project Sailaway began at Weight Watchers. Bunny checked in, caught up, paid up, and sighed with relief at a less-than-one-pound gain after many weeks of losing focus.

Next, we measured her pertinent parts: hips, waist, boobal regions, arms and thighs. We tucked all those highly classified numbers in a safe place.

Bunny’s Project Sailaway opponent, Trudy, did the same, under the direction of her sister. Trudy will be using a scale at her sister’s home that is calibrated to match the scale in Trudy’s doctor’s office.

Gosh, this is so scientific!

Bunny’s Week One went well. She walked past chocolate cake two-and-one-quarter times. She kept to her Weight Watchers points each day, and for the week. She wrote down what she ate most of the time. She ate a cross-section of protein, healthy fats, fruits, veggies and dairy.

Actually, she ended up being a tad light on the veggies, and she drank some water but not enough, but we’ll work on that.

Shaking Cow

Not THAT kind of shake!

She had more protein than she anticipated, because as soon as she walked into the office with her cooler full of carrot sticks and yogurt and such, her friend convinced her that they should have protein shakes for lunch.

Yes, we hear you. This friend just signed up as an Herbalife representative, of COURSE he’s pushing protein shakes for lunch!

Hey. He’s not like that. He knows his stuff. He’s a former athlete and personal trainer, and he’s Bunny’s great friend who would never take advantage of her for mere money.

Yes, we’re sure.

That said, Bunny isn’t too thrilled with the Herbalife idea. Her aunt went into it once years ago with the intention of becoming extremely wealthy. We’re still waiting.

More to the point, when Bunny protested that a woman her age with a desk job probably didn’t need that much protein, her friend replied that when you cut your calorie intake drastically your body thinks it’s starving and it tries to defend its weight.

Great. Just what we need. Errol Flynn defending Bunny’s fat. We don’t have enough problems?

Blender Shake

That's better!

Protein, he explained, makes your body feel like it’s getting the nutrients it needs, and keeps it from resisting your weight-loss efforts.

So, protein it is. Some protein at every meal and every snack.

We’ll see how it’s working later today at the dreaded WEEK ONE WEIGH-IN!

Project Sailaway Begins!

June 14, 2010

Cruise ShipToday is Day One of Bunny’s weight-loss competition with her friend Trudy.

The girls and their hubbies will be off on a cruise to Hawaii later this year.  A traumatic swimsuit-shopping experience has Trudy resolved to skim off a few dozen pounds before the big event. Bunny thought that was a great idea and hopped on board, and they decided to make a game of it.

Only it’s not a game. It’s a serious competition. Trudy is extremely focused and ridiculously competitive, and she will never let Bunny hear the end of it if she wins.

Seriously. Never.

So it starts today.

Each participant was weighed today–Trudy at her doctor’s office, Bunny at a Weight Watchers meeting–to make it official. Bunny hasn’t been to a weigh-in for several weeks, but she only gained 8/10 of a pound, despite last week’s birthday festivities. Not too bad.

The girls live across the country from each other, so in order to keep them honest, a disinterested and reliable party was assigned to–well, to put it bluntly, check upon them and keep them from cheating. Bunny’s gym buddy Mollie and Trudy’s sister are the designated keepers of the trust.

We also took the girls’ measurements. Neither one will let us share their weight or measurements, at least not yet, but we have the numbers tucked away in a safe place, and will share how much hast been lost along the way.

And off we go!

Birthday cake

Enjoy those nice dinners and lunches with your friends, Bunny. And the birthday cake at the office.

Enjoy it.

Because in four days, it’s over.

It’s all coming off.

The weight loss challenge will begin!

Bunny vs. Trudy, to see which one can lose more weight before their cruise this fall!

Happy birthday, Bunny!

Hi. It’s been a while, we know. We’re sorry.

We’re having a little bit of a problem with Bunny. She’s had some motivation issues in the past few weeks.

Mollie has gotten her into the gym a couple of times, but not regularly. Bunny couldn’t do their Saturday walk to the farmers’ market due to previous engagements.

Food-wise, she’s off her feed–or rather, on it. She’s not focused. She’s going out for lunch with her friends at work pretty regularly, and that’s never good in terms of keeping her food intake and her Weight Watchers points under control.

She hasn’t been to Weight Watchers in, well…

But we really think she’s going to turn it around very shortly. In about 10 days.

Why, you ask?

Fat MermaidWell, Bunny and Buff spent the weekend with their friends. The ones they’re going with on a cruise to Hawaii this Fall for Buff’s big birthday.

So here’s the thing. Bunny and her girlfriend went swimsuit shopping this weekend. Her girlfriend is in about the same situation Bunny is in, shape-wise.

They scared each other.

After they both stopped screaming in terror at the sight of themselves and each other in swimsuits, they had a couple of glasses of wine and made a deal that they are both going to lose weight before that cruise.

Bunny’s friend wants to lose 40 pounds. We’re sure sure that number is feasible, but she’s extremely competitive, so you never know. We suggested they turn it into a contest to see who can lose more weight, and let us post the results on this blog. They’re game, so that’s the plan.

First we need a name for the project.

Hawaii 4-0?

Project Swimsuit?

Two Fat Old Ladies Dieting So They Won’t Be Mistaken For Whales?

Whale On ScaleNeeds work.

Now, those of you who have paid close attention may ask–why 10 days? Why not now?

Bunny’s birthday is coming up.

Bunny has lots of good friends who like to take her out to lunch and dinner for her birthday, and there’s normally cake at the office on her big day.

It’s also her best friend’s birthday a couple of days later. Same problem. Party, dinner, cake.

So we’ll start the contest the day after her best friend’s birthday.

Stay tuned.