Oh, no. A Bunny Basket.

April 26, 2011

Easter candyIt’s Easter!

You know what that means, right?

A festival of sugar and candy, right up there with Halloween and Christmas.

How is a person supposed to lose weight when surrounded by Peeps and M&Ms and Cadbury eggs?

We learned in last year’s Easter post just how damaging those innocent-looking marshmallowy chocolatey things can be.

So there’s Bunny at work, minding her own business, and a kind and well-meaning employee proudly presents her with a beautiful Easter basket.

Oh, crap. How kind.

She had made it herself, and had clearly put a lot of effort into it. There was a stuffed bunny, a game of Carrot Baseball (ooo, fun–hit the ball with a plastic bat that looks like a carrot, lots of fun and $1 at Aahs!, thank you very much), and lots and lots of you-know-what.

Candy.

Really? Candy? Bunny doesn’t even really like candy. Well, she likes it, but she can go a long time without having any candy, and it doesn’t bother her.

But there it was. Big as life and twice as fattening.

She considered her options:

(1) Thank the giver kindly, explain that she is trying to lose weight, and ask if it would be ok if she gave the candy to others in the office. This was the best solution, but she couldn’t do it. She knew that it would hurt the poor lady’s feelings.

(2) Eat it all? Ummm…..no.

(3) Make a big deal about how cute the basket is, take a picture of it so the person will feel special. Then keep the bunny in her office, as well as a small sampling of the goodies, and take the basket and most of the goodies home. Pretend that she’s eating all the candy throughout the next month or so, at home, making a casual comment about how yummy it is here and there, but in reality, take the candy and the basket to the family’s Easter brunch as a hostess gift, and make it THEIR problem.

That’s what she did. So far, it’s working.

So she had a little more candy than she wanted to, but she did minimize the damage.

And her thoughtful employee is happy.

And Bunny’s still working on the Walk-!t Challenge (exclamation point).

Happy Easter!

Let’s face it. Bunny’s having trouble losing weight. The things that used to work, don’t work so well anymore. Getting old sucks.

She’s discouraged, but she’s not giving up.

She has had a monthly pass to Weight Watchers for over a year. She’s been paying $35 a month to NOT attend meetings and pretty much NOT follow the program. The stupidity of this was not lost on her, but she was kind of ignoring it, until Buff (who is very smart and kind of cheap) pointed it out. She knew she should either (a) start going to meetings, or (b) cancel the monthly pass and just kept her access to the Weight Watchers website.

Bunny knows that her job makes it very difficult for to get to meetings. Weight Watchers is cutting the number of meetings, and with the choices becoming more and more limited, it’s less and less likely that she will be able to attend. So she went with choice (b), eTools, access to the website. Half the price of the other option.

So there she was on WeightWatchers.com, and there was a big announcement about The Walk-!t Challenge. (The “I” in Walk-It is an exclamation point. How cute is that?)

It said:

Walkers

 

Join thousands of others to walk (or run) a 5K…

oh no. A 5K? No way. I think I’ll check my Twitter.

…and support The Alliance for a Healthier Generation. We’ll hel pyou train for a 5K, find an event near you or map your own walk.

Make no mistake, Bunny has no intention of walking a 5K. Isn’t that that thing where you run 42 miles, then ride a bike to Colorado, then swim shark-infested waters all the way to Hawaii?

She kept reading, curious at how Weight Watchers was going to claim that their clientele could do such a thing.

She looked at the training guide: a 6-week plan, setting forth a daily schedule for how long you should walk. It never went over an hour, and there were lots of days off.

This will help me swim with the sharks?

google google google

5k = 5 kilometers, which is approximately 3.1 miles.

oh.

Is that all?

I can do that. I used to do that at the gym, on a good day. What’s the big deal?

Well, the first part is “used to.” Bunny used to walk three miles at the gym. Not lately.

Another problem Bunny has is stamina. Not regular workday stamina, she can get through the day fine, but walking stamina. She has noticed that she gets a little winded after a short walk. This makes her feel old and fat.

Another one of Bunny’s problems lately is achy muscles. And she’s kind of creaky. She doesn’t move as well as she used to.

And lunch. She’s spending too much money on lunch at work. She and two other ladies go out for lunch almost every day. They take turns, and yesterday it cost her $65. For a turkey sandwich? $20 a day for lunch is $100 a week. Too much. Too much.

And then there was this article on Yahoo! (oooo another exclamation point!) yesterday that offered the charming statistic that people who sit most of the day are 54% more likely to die of a heart attack. Desk jockeys, get up and walk!

If Bunny did the Walk-!t Challenge at lunchtime, instead of sitting in a restaurant spending money, it might give her some help in ALL those areas!

Not to mention help her lose weight!

And feel better about her old, fat self!

She’s going to do it, exclamation point