Pigging Out

January 3, 2010

Bunny’s been slacking.

Buff’s been off his diet, and there are evil things in the house. Things like leftover pizza and Mother’s Circus Animal Cookies.

The weekend involved 3 movies and 3 bags of movie popcorn.

At lunchtime, she walked right past the Gelson’s nice fresh points-friendly salad bar and headed straight for Wolfgang Puck’s Chicken Caesar Salad. We’ve discussed that before. This is a sign that Bunny has lost her focus. She knows that the salad bar is a better choice. She’s not in the driver’s seat right now.

She’s not counting points, she’s skipping meals, she’s dipping her hand into a bag of pretzels mindlessly.

She’s in that spiral that ends in that land where Butterfingers and chocolate chip muffins reign supreme, and there’s not a lettuce leaf or a skinny person to be found.

This.  Stops.  Now.

We’re going to drag her to Weight Watchers tomorrow, and we’re going to glue her Weight Watchers points counter to her hand so she can’t open the refrigerator door, and we’re going to make damned good and sure she eats exactly 30 points, no more and no less. We’re going to follow her around and make her life a living hell until she gets back on track.

If she’s not in control, we will take over until we can shove her back into the driver’s seat.

We suspect this is the final fall-out from the holidays. She fought challenge after challenge and succeeded countless times, but now she has slipped off the path. Instead of skipping down the yellow brick road, she’s sitting under one of those apple trees inhaling Skinny Cow Chocolate Truffle Bars a box at a time, with a sprinkling of Williams-Sonoma Peppermint Bark Cookies (which she hates because they’re about 10 times too sweet).

Think good thoughts, and stand by for the weigh-in.

Cue spooky music.

Bunny has been saying “no, thanks” to a lot of things she would have grabbed before she began this journey:Fly

Muffins. Oh, how Bunny loves muffins. Especially after a healthy breakfast shake.

Wolfgang Puck’s Chicken Caesar Salad. Pre-packaged, yummy, for sale at your local Gelson’s. (Calories: 870, Fat: 66g, Carbs: 25g, Protein: 45g.) Bunny walked right past it and headed for the salad bar, where she assembled a lovely collection of fresh veggies. Good Bunny!

Starbucks. Bunny used to go with a Grande Chai Nonfat Latte with one Spenda. And 2 cookies. Today: Grande Nonfat Cappuccino, one Splenda, and definitely no cookies.

Deli DoRight. At the deli, Bunny passed on the bagel and bagel chips.

Football game snacks: She forewent—(oh, that can’t be the correct past tense of forego. BRB . . . Well, what do you know? According to Dictionary.com, it sure is. Moving on. . .) 
Bunny forewent the standard chips, ice cream and popcorn, and brought some nice green grapes to snack on. On which to snack. For snacking. She ate green grapes!

Zero Coke? Bunny is choosing water instead of Coke Zero. (Diet Coke is SO last-season!)